The biggest decision I ever made was the one to become a mother. I had done all of the motherly duties, the motherly loving, stress, late night worries… and yet at the end of the day no matter how much I was deeply and truly in love with those adorable kids, they still weren’t my babies. And so I planned for it, I bought for it, I emerged myself in it… and yet I just wasn’t on board with it at all. I planned and purchased for five years… and never decided in all of that time to take the plunge.

Then one day, we were attending a funeral for the kids’ grandma, Beeta. Sitting there in the church I heard an overwhelming voice in my head that told me it was now. I didn’t have to listen, it was now. I didn’t have to choose, it was now. I didn’t have to plan, it was now. And I knew that voice was right. So we did it. We jumped in and I became pregnant that very first month.

I was so happy. All of that planning finally put to use. I kept up with my regular life of fitness, diet coke, chocolate bars, chicken and veggies… until I was out shopping at 13 1/2 weeks. I came home from the afternoon and I was suddenly panic stricken when I realized that for several hours I hadn’t even thought about the baby. I knew it right then and there… something was wrong. How could I not be connected to that amazing little being if she was still there. Over the next couple days I miscarried. I was heart broken and sick inside that I had done something horrible that caused it. That I had spent too many years planning, and not enough time had been spent actually living the moment.

Over the next several months I prodded through life. We were building a new house. I spent the days crying in bed, eating junk, and the nights crying in bed and eating junk. We finished building our house, even though my heart really wasn’t in it anymore. This all happened in October. And in January they finally finished the house and we moved in.

That first few weeks I finally started to come back to life, and that seemed to be apparent when in February I found out I was pregnant again. I used that to change my life — and it wasn’t for the better. I stopped working out. I stopped eating the way I had eaten and I started using “cravings” as the basis for why I needed to eat. That included driving through McDonalds because baby wanted french fries… and honestly when she was 14 months that was lie that had gotten out of control.

When she was almost 2 we went on vacation. The most important decision I ever made had become the biggest scam I would ever try to pull over on myself. I couldn’t change… I was a mom now. When I saw the pictures from vacation in December – I knew the lies had to end. I had to come face to face with what being a mom really meant. That mean living my truth. My truth and my purpose had nothing to do with the life I was leading. NOTHING! Yet I had to be the one to change it for me, and not for her. It wasn’t that I was meant to become a mother, that important decision I had made in that church was to stop waiting and start living. That was exactly what I needed to do, and what I had been running away from the entire time. The biggest decision I ever made really wasn’t what I had thought. It wasn’t to become a mother, it was to be me. To live my life, and to live my truth.

I still have days when I struggle with my truth, and have the urge to run away and quit living life. But I need to put one step in front of the other every day regardless in order to do what I was meant to do. What you do today, isn’t about anyone but you. No matter what you think – it really all comes back to that. It’s you. You came here and you’ll leave here – and every second of your life is on you. Make the important decision today to stop running, and start being.

Technorati Tags: life lessons, life path, Living, soul purpose, truth

I was working out with Leandro Carvalho and my dog was just looking at me like I was completely nuts. He doesn’t get it. You can’t work out with a guy that wants you to do “sexy” moves and to work your “boom boom” and not enjoy yourself. So it got me thinking about how many of you are doing things in your life to fit in and be normal, and are not following your heart because you don’t want to look weird.

I had a client that I started with a pretty fun walking routine. If I asked you would you wave your arms while walking? At first she thought I was crazy, and then I shared with her that last year I even bundled up and walked in six degrees below zero! Walking is so beneficial and you need to get out and about in the air just to boost your mood. And sometimes you need to do something silly to help that process along. Don’t stay in the house all day. That = Depression! You know I find it funny as a Holistic Lifestyle Coach and Fitness Coach how often walking is overlooked. And there are plenty of good indoor walking programs as well that people can do. Forget what people think of you… be weird. Who wants to be normal. Normal is overweight, buried in debt and ready to give up. Weird is fun, happy and self connected!

That goes for all of the area of your life, not just your fitness. If you love to take photos, do it. If you love to bake cookies, do it – just don’t eat them all. Follow your dreams and follow your heart. That is your guide. It’s like the green arrow in the financial commercials. If you follow your heart and do what you love you will never go wrong in life. You will never need to live a lie and you will find balance, happiness and soul purpose.

Technorati Tags: be weird, fitness, have fun, soul purpose, walking

It took me a long time to figure out who I really was down deep in my soul, but I have to tell that figuring that out changed my life. Because I know who I am things are different. I am able to make better decisions, I connect with friends, family and strangers differently, I am a better wife and mother, and I am happier. Being aligned with your soul purpose is just that important.

So how did I figure it out? You know, it’s not a one size fits all sort of answer here. A lot of it came from stepping back and looking at my goals. By sorting out the direction I wanted to go I was able to see a clearer image of what my priorities in life really were. That allowed me to realize that some of the area I was focusing on in life really were just not for me. It didn’t align with who I was at all. Some of what I saw in myself I didn’t like, because I didn’t want to delve into my soul. Working from a place of truth is not always going to be easy. But I did it and I can now embrace who I am. How many of you really love who you are? How many of you really love where you are? Figuring this all out allows you to find that self-love that is required for true happiness in this life.

I challenge you to sit down today and write out what your priorities are. Look at the goals you have and see if they are aligned. You may be surprised at what you see. If you are ready, join the program. The only thing standing in the way of you living your soul purpose is you.

Technorati Tags: alignment, challenge, Goals, self-love, soul purpose, soulutions program